Happy Birthday to Me!

 

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My friends and loved ones,

Friday, I return to Rome with my throat and lungs on fire! That does not stop me from meeting Josée, Bobby and Guillaume who are also in Rome at the same time! What a coincidence! They invite me for super to celebrate my upcoming birthday. Of course, we eat at La Taverna dei Fori Imperiali, but not before having a drink in a small eclectic bar!







We are also on the same flight the next day when my throat and lungs decide to catch fire! I have never lived through such a painful flight. Luckily Josée was there to comfort me, rub my back and provide me with lots of pharmaceuticals.

I arrive home at 3:30 p.m. Saturday. At 3:45 p.m., I am showered, in bed, medicated and I don’t get up until 6:30 Monday morning to go to work. Forty hours of sleep can help anyone to get back in shape. I taught with my raunchy voice, consequence of my cold, and my blocked ears, consequence of the altitude change at our arrival.

Finally, it is my xxth birthday today! I am very happy to have been to Positano for this great occasion, even if five days in Positano are never enough and even if the last two days were spent in bed sick as a dog. 

I have no regrets!



To my next trip,

Diane  


Seafood and Career Choice

 

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My friends, my loved ones,

I began my day at 1 p.m. La dolce vita. At Chez Black, I choose sauted seafood with garlic and olive oil, but first I would like to eat once again the cherry tomato mini-pizza I had last night. I wait for Pepe to give him my order and I see him arrive with, oh yes, a cherry tomato mini-pizza! Do you believe me now when I say they know me well! 

So simple and so delicious!

Savouring my pizza as I lick my fingers, I receive my bowl of seafood. How can I describe this pure delight… The bowl is filled with clams, baby clams and mussels and the sauce coating the bottom of the bowl consists of the cooking juices of the mollusks, garlic and olive oil. That is it. A basket of fresh Italian bread is placed at the table as an accompaniment. As I take each shell between my fingers to extract the meaty flesh with my teeth, I taste the sea, then I dip pieces of bread in the sauce and I can only close my eyes with pleasure. I honestly think I was born to live here and eat this dish every day. 



That’s it! I have found my goal in life: eat seafood and while I’m at it, welcome the uniformed boat captains stopping by to visit Positano for the day and write to you about it on my blog. It is my new career choice: savoring seafood, welcoming uniformed boat captains and writing. Someone has to do it!

I must mention a few things concerning the people who visit Positano. I’m not talking about the tourists, who identify themselves just by the way they are dressed, but the other specimen: the children of the nouveau-riche arriving by yacht or limousine from Capri, Ravello, Amalfi and even Naples to be seen in the beautiful city of Positano. This specimen exhibits the following characteristics: good-looking, slim, tanned, clean, stylish hair, proper makeup and wearing the latest couture and don’t even get me started on the beautiful shoes! I always take pleasure in observing this specimen strut along the boardwalk and making sure they are seen even as to pose once in a while to impress the crowd. I must confess that I do not envy the specimen because as beautiful as it may be, it has not been blessed either by the size or the efficiency of its brain. I can only envy the beautiful shoes! I may not have a slender waist line anymore, my ass will never look like it did at 20, my flabby arms will never be tight as when I was 16, but I find much comfort in the fact that I would rock those fuck-me shoes!

I’ve noticed many changes in Positano. I think there’s a new mayor in town because the city has never been this alive so early in the season:

-        The streets, what am I saying, the main street is much narrower, which I thought impossible in the past, as parking for Vespas is now permitted in many more places, causing horrible traffic;




-        All the kiosks for boat tours are up and running;




-        One of the kiosks on the dock which sells ice cream and sodas during the day is converted into a bar with music at night;


-        The Music on the Rocks discotheque, built in the rocks, is open each night instead of Fridays only and opens at 11:30 p.m. instead of midnight;




-        An ATM has been placed on the walkway between the basilica and the beach. You can now confess your sins then commit more sins after collecting a lot of cash in the ATM;




-         I see much less animals left to their own devices doing their doodoo everywhere, which explains Giovanni’s adoption.



It's a new day and I give in to nostalgia by returning to my favorite boutiques to buy shoes and pottery and to say hello to my friends I spent time with each day during my three-month adventure. I have lunch at La Cambusa to once again stuff my face with seafood. I must be careful not to overdose like last time! But no chance to overdose on Aperol Spritz!

Another night at the hotel restaurant to savour a delicious Bresaola carpaccio with arugula and Parmesan followed by a rack of lamb served with small potatoes and green peas. I finish my meal with another breast! Delicious!






When I travel, I am always surprised by the way tourists act. A couple close by hold hands, bow their heads and pray before eating their meal. I’m not judging at all, it is just very unfamiliar to me. I am surprised when I see women relentlessly lick their knives during their meal. Now I’m judging! Stop you Cro-Magnon women! I am always surprised of men that come to eat in a dining room, and not the snack bar, dressed with flip-flops, Bermuda shorts and a baseball cap. Now I’m judging again! It makes me nauseous seeing their hairy toes and their disgusting toenails! I demand the return of a dress code in dining rooms! OK, I’ve had my fit…

I wake up the next morning with a sore throat. I know someone who gave me his cold! I gargle warm salt water hoping not to suffer too much later on. Sorry in advance to all passengers I may contaminate in the plane Saturday morning!


Last day in Positano and the weather is sublime! Sun, sun and more sun! I soak in a few rays of sunshine, I relax, I willingly accept to be contaminated again by the same guilty party, I continue to gargle warm salted water, I drink an Apérol Spritz, then another, I eat lobster and pasta and even sick, I’m the happiest girl in the world.







Diane xxx...

Home Sweet Home

 

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My friends, my loved ones,

A new adventure begins.



Piazza Navona
I finally feel Roman. This is a big statement, I know. Some of you will think I am naïve to assume that anyone can become Roman but I do, at least I feel as if I have. When in Rome, I now know where I’m going, believe it or not, I often tell taxi drivers where to go, I don’t need a map anymore, I even unconsciously forgot my map in Montreal. I can now take the time to admire the apartment buildings where I imagine I could live in instead of taking pictures at every corner. Over the years, I have actually walked everywhere and already have a picture of every corner!

The moment I land on Italian soil, I speak the language without any self-consciousness. It just so happened that, for the first time in my life, I was the first person to get off a commercial plane and felt very special to lead all the tourists through the Fiumicino airport where I’m beginning to feel at home as well.

Finally, home sweet home.

I must now describe to you my favorite restaurant in Rome where I am dining tonight: La Taverna dei Fori Imperiali located in Monti. 




It is a typical rustic roman restaurant that can seat about 50. Its charm does not only come from the worn-out brick columns, the old pictures of Rome and pictures of favorite customers on the walls nor the paintings and drawings offered from local artists, nor from the open kitchen at the back, but also by the owner Alessio and his children that offer an impeccable service. I am also head over heels about the minuscule street on which the restaurant is located only accessed on foot or motorino.

It is important for me to mention at this point that Italian restaurants are the single woman’s greatest gift for two reasons: one, the waiters are somehow always good-looking and charming, and second of all, they offer half liters of house wine, which for a single lady, is a necessity!

As I sit at my table, one of the cute waiters brings me a basket of wonderful smelling hot Italian bread. As a first-time customer, I suggest you order anything on the menu that has “alla Romana” in its name. For example, as an antipasto, “Porchetta alla romana” is a sure thing. It is a hardy, meaty dish but offers slices of porchetta beautifully seasoned served with fresh Italian bread covered in local olive oil. You can then have “Fettucini carbonara,” a Roman specialty, prepared with fresh pasta, local intense orange colored egg yolks, pecorino cheese and “guanciale” instead of pancetta, which is cured pork cheeks (guanciale means cheek), more fatty but oh so good! Serve me this type of meal with half a liter of wine and I’m more than satisfied! 


Porchetta alla romana


Fettucini carbonara


If you are a group of friends, I then suggest a beautiful mixed antipasto dish with melanzane alla parmigiana, deep fried cheeses and other surprises to be shared with love. For vegetarians, there are always multiple options, but I strongly suggest the “Carciofo fritto,” a fried artichoke that is insanely delicious, crispy on the outside and tender on the inside! I’ve tried to make this at home, but our Canadian artichokes are no comparison with the fresh, delicate and tender Italian artichokes. If I was to live in Rome, the Monti neighborhood would be one of my first choices. It is a small gathering of minuscule streets with many intimate bars and restaurants situated in the center of the city (close to the Coliseum). I would probably ask for a designated table at La Taverna dei Fori Imperiali and invite my visiting friends for a memorable meal hoping they would feel the same about this special place. I only ask one thing from my visiting friends: when at the table, leave your damn portable phone in your pocket or your purse, whichever it may be, and enjoy every moment of your Roman experience, unless it is to take a picture of your meal, which I am guilty of, but put it away right after!

The next day, I took the train from Rome to Naples where a private car was waiting for me and cutie patootie Vincenzo was holding my name at the end of the dock. What a pleasure to speak Italian for two and a half hours! Yes, you heard me right! A trip that should have taken one hour and a half became much longer due to Easter day traffic. But who cares, I’m in Italy on my way to paradise. As we get closer and I catch a glimpse of Positano, I get teary-eyed from so much happiness from the beauty I see and nostalgia for my past trips.

I arrive at the hotel Buco du Bacco, it is 1:30 p.m.

My room and view from my balcony


I even have a small balcony the bathroom!









I am starving! I unpack my things and head for the hotel restaurant. Let’s begin my food journey: fried zucchini flowers stuffed with fresh mozzarella followed by grilled squid served with burrata cheese, sliced raw artichokes and a drizzle of sweet balsamic vinegar. Keep in mind the freshness and tenderness of the small Italian artichokes. A half bottle of house white wine from Ravello and I am utterly content!






It is cloudy but a perfect day for an exhausted woman! The long flight and the Easter weekend traveling family with multiple children and an unsatisfied infant offering a wake-up call at 7 a.m. caused me to be dead tired and ready for a good night sleep. But not before my first night out at Chez Black of course!

I get all dolled up for a night out. My return at Chez Black was as expected, one after another, the staff came to great me with open arms, hugs and kisses: Come stai bella Diana? Where have you been? It’s been much too long! How’s your novel coming? How long are you staying? Only five days! No! (How they know me well! Five days is a real quickie for me. I’ve never been in and out of Positano so fast, no pun intended!). Please sit at your table! Now guys, how can I not feel as if I’m coming home with this overwhelming greeting? 

I don’t even need to look at the menu, my choice is made: spaghetti alle vongole. I need fresh seafood immediately! Might I remind you that the best seafood is found in southern Italy, the best cherry tomatoes are grown in Italy, the best lemons, olives, caffè, the best mozzarella is produced in Italy, the best prosciutto, olive oils, Limoncello, pasta, pizza… Shall I go one?




First thing I ask is if Giovanni is still here. They say a local woman is now taking care of him and he doesn’t come out at night anymore, but I could see him walking around in the morning doing his business. Oh I hope I will see him this week. Positano is not Positano without him…

Giovanni to the right


Second thing I ask Gianfranco, Mr. Black’s son, is if he is finally married with children. Ladies, I am happy to inform you that he has been single for a year now after a nine-year relationship. 

Gianfranco front and center!

During the evening, I also have the surprise visit of the village crazy lady that decided to sit right in front of me on the boardwalk bench to watch me eat. She is not dangerous, just curious or bored or delusional or all of the above. I nod to acknowledge her presence and eat my meal. Pepe offers me a small pizza as an antipasto with fresh cherry tomatoes, salt and olive oil. Please believe me when I say it’s the best pizza I’ve ever eaten. The pizza is crisp but tender at the same time, the tomatoes are sweet which the taste is enhanced by a pinch of salt and the olive oil adds a peppery taste and drips down your chin. Heaven!

I look around and it’s as if I have never left, as if it was only yesterday that I was here for three months. I never want to leave again…

Pepe offers me a Amalfi Coast specialty for desert: a lemon “cupoline” which means dome, but Italians add a cherry or a strawberry on top to make it look like a perfect breast, of course… It is made of whipped cream with lemon zest and candied lemon, which I usually don’t like but the local lemons are so fresh and tender that they do taste like candy! Since I can’t refuse this generous offer, I pop a couple of anti-lactose pills and eat my breast with pleasure! Mr. Black sits by my side and we catch up on the latest family and health news. He is getting old but is the heart of this place and could never retire.

Now that I have eaten like a pig, I change and take a long walk, which in Positano always includes many stairs. Perfect for my waistline, my butt and a good night sleep.

The next morning, a beautiful day awaits me. What shall I do? Nothing or nothing?




Talk to you soon my friends and loved ones.

Diane